So yesterday was St. Patrick’s day and despite the fact that I’m not Catholic or Irish and that I should have been at work, I was with Pete and Dave drinking Guinness. We started at the Burren in Davis Sq. then headed to the Field in central.

At the field, we met two older men, Jay and george, who had also cut out of work and were getting drunk to commemorate whatever it was that Patrick did (converted celtic druids to Christianity or something. I’ve heard something about chasing snakes off the island as well, but I think I believe the former more than the latter). We had a pretty wide ranging conversation and at one point we started talking about that jackass in west Virginia that won the largest lottery payout ever and keeps f’in up. Jay asked the table what they would do with the money.

ME: The payout is $180 million. I said I’d take $25 Mil and invest it and live off the interest. Then I’d help out family and friends and figured that would generously cost another $10 - $15 mil, so that leaves me with $140 million dollars. With that I’d set up some sort of foundation and give money away to non-profits and other organizations that I thought were worthy.

They laughed at me. They were nice, but basically said “stupid hippie” and then talked about all the whores they’d frequent in Southeast Asia. And alimony payments to future ex-wives. And that $180 million wouldn’t go as far as I think it would. I’m not kidding. They thought I was the stupid one.

But really, why wouldn’t you do this. Seriously. First of all, this money was just given to me, I didn’t work for it, it’s just dumb luck I’m now a hundred millionaire. Secondly, if I were that rich, I’d still want a job of some sort or I’d eventually get really bored. What could be better than a job where you just give people money? Just sit around, read grant proposals, and if they sound awesome, you just drop a few million on them. At least the money would be put to good use in the hands of people who were actually talented and would make difference, instead of whiny relatives that want a bigger pool or southeast asian whores.

Surprisingly, jay and george are Republicans.